The Winner of This Year’s NFL Drama Queen Award

We all admire the strong manly virtues of NFL players. They are open, direct, fresh, and uncomplicated. They are tough, resolute, and admirable. Every once in a while, however, one bad apple slips into the bunch. These are generally called “Drama Queens” by fellow players.

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Keyshawn Johnson recently raised the issue on a pregame television show.

Winning teams may have one drama queen on their roster and often can thrive despite this difficult handicap. To have two drama queens on a team may present conflicts and divisive locker-room spats.

These untalented diva types were once thought to be limited to bad stage productions or musical groups with bad hair days. More recently, in our metrosexual world, we can also find them in our professional athletes. Most shocking is the growing number in the NFL.

Hallmarks of the classic Drama Queen include emotional fuss over nothing, sudden anger flashes and outbursts (usually in front of journalists), and a sense of entitlement.

Players with initials for names are frequently thought to be quintessential drama queens, like T.O. or L.T.  Sometimes they have weird names like Starbury or Big Baby (to crossdress our sports).

This year, Super Bowl XLIII will feature a contest of Drama Queens. The winner may not win the game.

The team’s are equally handicapped. The Pittsburgh Steelers have as their centerpiece,
Ben Roethlisberger, publicly named a queen by Keyshawn Johnson. The Arizona Cardinals have the newest entry to the club: Anquan Boldin, who puts his selfless contract negotiations above the team.

For those interested in this contest, watching the sidelines during the game will be most important. You can count on the fact that the cameras will zero in on these two as they stalk the off-field.

Any antics will be judged as game breakers. Odds-makers ought to count this factor into their equation. Who will break first? Who will blow up over bad coaching and inept teammates? The excitement grows with each passing day until the Super Bowl!